Masculinity, toughness, resilience, rough look, hunk, dark ,tall,straight orientation, appropriate beard, your gait,curse words, josh a.k.a anger and a lot more to add to this list .It is not a exhaustive list.
What have you figured out so far from the list mentioned above ?
Do they all point to a common thing ?Yes, they do. The qualifications of being a MAN, not a good / Excellent/Saviour man but just a MAN.
I know we all are from a privileged section, well bred with empathy and passion, infused with morals and brought up in the most careful way possible. But even after all this we fail to escape from the societal influence, of what they demand us to be irrespective of the moral bubble in which we have been brought up.
As a man, I realise and empathize with every man out there who had failed to tick boxes in ALL or MOST of the these stereotypical standards. I know how it feels that you are not being man enough…
If you are empathetic, you are called sissy. If you are skinny, you are bullied. If you are homosexual, you are harassed emotionally and physically. If you don’t say curse words, maybe you are not a man in the real sense. If you are short, you are always intimidated by other men. If you show way too much expression / feeling, you are probably too girly. If you wear too flamboyant colours, you are considered not a gentleman but just a hippie/faggot in disguise.
How it’s possible to squeeze the population of men all-over the globe into these societal confirming standards.
To the bros/ men out there , aren’t you tired of pretending what you are not ? They’ll judge you eventually because we judge them too in one or the other way ! A paradox … Right ?
You don’t cease to be a man even if you don’t have any quality mentioned above. Learn to embrace the hatred / opinion of others and just keep going .
At the end of the day, you are alone and all what matters to you should be, Whether you were yourself enough today ?
It’s a marathon ,not a sprint and yes you’ll eventually learn to love.